82. Downsizing: Getting Comfortable Asking for Help

So many of us were raised to be self-sufficient, and that is something to be proud of. But when that independence turns into doing everything alone, even the things you do not have to, it starts working against you.

Jodi and Heather get personal about their own struggle with asking for help, then dig into why it matters even more during a big transition like downsizing. They cover what gets people to help you, and share practical ways to make it easier on everyone involved.

In this episode:

• Why people who help everyone else struggle the most to ask for help themselves
• The real difference between an ask that gets ignored and one that gets a yes
• Five kinds of help that often go unasked for
• Simple phrases that make it easier for someone to say yes
• What it costs you when you never ask
• A one-thing challenge to practice asking this week

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Transcript

Jodi Rosko 0:01

Welcome back to another episode of the Downsizing Roadmap Podcast with your hosts Jodi Rosko and Heather Fisher. We're talking about all things downsizing, from our own experiences with clients to guest experts. Let's make downsizing easier, one conversation at a time.

Heather Fisher 0:17

Hi, welcome to the Downsizing Roadmap Podcast. Today we're talking about getting comfortable asking for help.

Jodi Rosko 0:26

I think this is actually like for me, to me. I'm gonna just talk to myself.

Heather Fisher 0:31

Right. I'm like, I'm just here for the advice.

Jodi Rosko 0:35

What do we do? What am I saying about this? Because I'm saying it to myself.

Heather Fisher 0:40

Yes, I definitely struggle asking for help. I am so thankful my mom, you know, raised us to be self-sufficient. Self-sufficient and strong, you know, independent women, and as my mom would say, strong like bull. She would say that all the time. But then those personalities, I I think it's hard for all of us to ask for help, but uh some of us more than others.

Jodi Rosko 1:06

Yeah, I think it is definitely what values you grew up with. And um, we did a whole podcast on uh the history, you know, like our history and why we're so independent. Yeah um and so um that's an interesting one if you go back and listen to that one. But um it's so ingrained in us to, you know, be independent, especially depending on what, you know, uh generation you're from, um, but very, very independent um thinking and do it myself. And um that's why sometimes we see people, you know, don't take care of their houses and all of those things because they want to do it themselves. They don't even want to ask for help or hire help to do it, you know. Um, and so um, yeah, it's it's hard to get past that cultural conditioning around it. So that's what we're gonna talk about today. I'm Jodi Rosko. I'm Heather Fisher. And we just why I mean, uh asking for help just feels so hard sometimes. But um I so my Aunt Karen told me one time, and it just this really sunk into me, was um like it's a gift to let people help you, right? Because if you're the kind of person, most of the people who don't want to ask for help help everyone else. Yeah. But the only way that you can help people is if they're letting you help them, yeah, right? So they're all letting you help them. If you are the helper person and you don't want to ask for help yourself, all these other people are letting you help them. So you have to let them help you because that is giving them that gift of feeling like they're helping you, and everybody likes to help each other, right? And so that really kind of stuck with me that you know, people can only help you if you will accept it. And when she said that, I was like, Aren't you smart, Aunt Karen?

Heather Fisher 2:50

Yes. Such a great way to look at it, Aunt Karen. Thank you for the advice. We need her here.

Jodi Rosko 2:55

Every once in a while I get it in my ear, and I'm like, oh yeah. Give them that gift of letting them help you.

Heather Fisher 3:01

Yeah, I think that's so true. Um, we find um, you know, people want to help. I mean, I think us humans, we all get that good feeling from helping, and we all want to help. Um, and so we're gonna talk a little bit today on some um ways to to go about that where you're giving someone that path that makes it easy for them to help and you know removes that that burden and the vagueness and just takes that away because people love to help. And when you make it an easy path of specifically what you want and how they can help, uh, that's just a win-win for everybody.

Jodi Rosko 3:41

Yeah. Yeah. I think that the a lot of generational, there's a lot of generational pride around um we don't tell anybody our business.

Heather Fisher 3:49

Yeah.

Jodi Rosko 3:50

We don't um we we just we're we were taught to figure it out for ourselves. We can fix all the things, we can, you know, make you know, the food lasts. There's all kinds of like things that you that we were taught that we're just gonna figure it out. We're gonna figure it out ourselves. And that's great. Um, but sometimes you don't need to figure it out yourself, and sometimes people really want to help you, but they don't know how. Um, and so that's something that we're gonna talk about. Shame and guilt sometimes. It feels like, oh, I should be able to do this myself. Um and you feel like you're a burden, um, or you feel like um you should be able to handle it yourself, but you you know, not being able to makes you feel inadequate in some way. Um again, nope, just you know, being willing to, you know, d help people. So we we love helping others, but we resist having others help us, and so that's just something we need to get our mindset around in a different way.

Heather Fisher 4:46

Yeah, and if you've been the person that has been the helper um, you know, all of the time and you've been the one giving, it's hard to um you know shift that role and acknowledge that you need some help.

Jodi Rosko 5:00

That's just well and sometimes I think we don't realize you you have to be filled back up sometimes too, right? Like you're you so helping others sometimes will fill you back up, but sometimes when you help so many other people and you don't take care of yourself, you empty some part of yourself there, right? And so you have to get that filled back up in a way, and sometimes you have to let somebody else fill it up for you, like you know, do help you. And some people will help lots and lots, but then they kind of feel resentment, like nobody's helping me, but they're not letting them help them. Like so that's are you that are you doing that? Is that when you're like if your mindset is like, oh my gosh, I help everybody else and nobody helps me, are you letting them help you? Or are you you know pushing them off and they're trying to help you and like no no I got that, I got that, I got that. And so then they think, oh, she's fine, like she doesn't need it, and you do need it, you just have get sent the wrong messages.

Heather Fisher 5:53

Yeah, absolutely. I think one other bonus um is that people don't always realize um what resources or help is out there, and that can both be through um, you know, like we've uncovered in focusing on downsizing, so many resources that are available for people that we could share with you if you uh tell us your hurdle and ask and and all of that. But a lot of um amongst your family and friends, you know, for instance, you know, you have a tree that needs cut down in your yard. You don't know that your neighbor has exactly the saw that would make it a 10-minute job versus you know, you working on it for 10 hours because you don't have the right tools or the right strength or the right ladder, things like that. Um so putting that ask out there, sometimes the solution is so much easier than what you're slogging through trying to do something yourself.

Jodi Rosko 6:51

Yes, for sure. You don't know what other people have or what their skills are or what their talents are. Um and sometimes just having somebody else with you is is they have a different perspective. So um so what the some of the benefits of of asking for help are it builds connection and trust, right? So it deepens your relationships. And so um if you're if you're sorting through things and you're spending some time um telling your stories about the things, um they get to know you better and um you get to share with them and you get to they can relate to stories that they have in their life or they can learn something about you. Um so I think you know the relationships that happen when you're asking for help or um helping each other helps you, you know, make deeper connections with people.

Heather Fisher 7:39

Yeah, I think that uh reciprocity really ends up benefiting both people when you open that door and ask for that help, um you're able to return the favor in in um you know gifts of time or energy or skills that you have back and forth, and it becomes just this relationship that is much deeper because you're both helping, you know, each other, yeah, maybe in different ways.

Jodi Rosko 8:05

Yeah, it also models healthy behavior, right? If you're asking for help, maybe somebody who's afraid to ask for help will think, oh, that's okay. If they're asking, I can ask for help back or I can ask to. Um, it creates community. That's how um churches and neighborhoods and families stay strong, right? So that's how that works is if you are working together for a cause of something, right?

Heather Fisher 8:27

Yeah, back to like barn raising days, the whole town just gathered, like we're putting up Joe's barn today.

Jodi Rosko 8:33

And yeah, what's that saying about like the more hands make quick work or whatever? Oh yeah, yeah, we have um I don't know what that means.

Heather Fisher 8:40

Many hands make light work, yes, something like that.

Jodi Rosko 8:44

Yeah, like so. If you think something's like overwhelming, but you can get some people to help, and maybe that's just moving heavy things or you know, whatever. Um, but the more the more the better in you know, getting some in something done, especially if you're cleaning out something and you just actually need to do some physical cleaning or things, you know, that kind of stuff. If somebody everybody takes a job, that happens so much more quickly than if you're just trying to do it all yourself.

Heather Fisher 9:09

Yeah, absolutely.

Jodi Rosko 9:10

And it helps you avoid um burnout or maybe injury if you're trying to lift heavy things, but um if it's if you're have if you're doing a big transition and you're having to kind of sort through through things over and over and over every day, um, you can definitely burn out. And just having some camaraderie or having somebody to share that with or some make sure you don't pick somebody who wants to keep everything. Make sure you pick somebody who um, you know, just has a perspective that that they're you're working through to let go of things. Um but that can help you so much just mentally not feeling like you're alone doing it.

Heather Fisher 9:43

Yeah, and getting through uh with some help to accomplish a big project of you know reducing things or getting a big cleaning job done, it can uh have that ripple effect of everything after it being easier because you have more space or you have less to clean or things like that, um, because you asked for help to get over that initial mountain.

Jodi Rosko 10:07

Yeah, and it's not taking, it's it's asking for you know somebody to walk with you through the process, like just inviting somebody to share that process with you instead of thinking that you're taking in. I will say um when we see this, so many of the kids um want to help, but they don't know how. And that goes back to, I know I'm always go back to that first step, because I think the first step is the one that gets um skipped the most in our five-step process. And the first step is to be dreamy about what is happening and kind of come up with what you want that future to look like. And if you do that, then you have parameters to to invite somebody to help you and be much more specific and and you you guys can have a conversation about what that future is gonna look like so everybody's on the same page, and so when everybody's on the same page, you know what you're working towards, and then you can how you know break that down into specific things that need to be done, and then you can ask for help. Because if you're just like, I need help, um your kids don't know what that means. Um, like they they want to help you, but they don't know where to start, and you don't know where to start. So if you start with what that future looks like and what you think you're gonna need, and I don't really need anything from this basement except for you know a few specific special things, then okay, what are we gonna do with all over the rest of that stuff? That's a project, right? That turns into something that's more specific and easy to understand. I need help with the garage because I'm not gonna I'm moving into a condo and I'm not gonna need any of these gardening tools anymore, or I'm not gonna, you know, whatever. You you're you have more parameters to help understand.

Heather Fisher 11:43

I know um from my own experience, that's so much more helpful. Um, you know, when I can be visiting my mom and be like, okay, make a list. If there's things you need me to do, we can just work through that list real quick and then move on to visiting or going to lunch or whatever we were gonna do, rather than that vague, like, oh, I'm just feeling overwhelmed. And I would love to help her, but I don't know what chunk I can tackle and get done and make progress without knowing that overall plan or just those things of like here's specifically what I need help with. I can absolutely do that.

Jodi Rosko 12:25

Well, and if you're the adult kid, um, if they're saying they're overwhelmed, ask them what's bugging them the most, right? What is the thing that's irritating them the most? And it may be like, ugh, I can't get these things upstairs, or I can't get these things downstairs, or I need to, you know, I can't, I just have been focusing on all those pictures I have in that, you know, what whatever it is that, you know, they might have, you know, something specific. What's bothering you the most? Let's hit let's tackle that first. And if it's you uh getting ready to ask your kids, to ask yourself the same question. What is what's bugging you? Is it, you know, all that stuff keeps all that Tupperware falls out of that one cupboard every time I open it, right? We're gonna deal with that. Like, what is it? It doesn't even have to be anything, you know, monumental or like I want to deal with every you know sentimental thing that I have in the house today. Like it can be something like that cupboard bugs me, or you know, this, I can't open that door all the way because I put a bunch of stuff over there. You know, whatever it is. Um, and you can handle things little bits at a time, and then it it will snowball into something bigger that feels great.

Heather Fisher 13:27

Yeah, absolutely. So let's talk a little bit about what happens when you don't ask for help. You can live um, you know, in loneliness or just that feeling of overwhelm, or miss an opportunity that comes along because you're not ready for it because you still need the help but you haven't asked for it.

Jodi Rosko 13:48

I mean, what happened like for me, uh um my mom, a lot of stuff, I didn't get the stories of it, and I missed the opportunity forever because I won't ever get to get those stories. Um and so um don't do that. You know, share your share what's important about the stuff that you have and spend the time to be able to do that.

Heather Fisher 14:08

Yeah, absolutely. Um you can be uh putting your health or your safety at risk if you're not asking for help and you're being you know stubborn at that. I've seen, you know, family members do that and just continue doing something that someone um else could do um with a lot less risk and would be happy to do for you.

Jodi Rosko 14:30

Yeah, moving heavy things, heavy boxes, getting up on ladders, you know, any kinds of those things. Just somebody else that's you know younger and more able can probably definitely do that easier and with less risk of injury.

Heather Fisher 14:43

Yeah, pulling down decorations from addicts, things like that. Um or resentment if you are feeling like nobody helps me, my kids aren't helping me, and you're just feeling resentful. It may be just looking at yourself and making sure you've actually asked. Yeah. Because it is hard as um the adult kid to make assumptions and you know feel like you're crossing boundaries if you just start doing things that maybe weren't asked of you. That dynamic, uh that parent-child dynamic is tough to navigate sometimes. So if you're feeling like you wish you had more help, but people aren't offering to help, sometimes it honestly does have to start with a an ask.

Jodi Rosko 15:31

And and a specific ask. I think that's the key is the more specific that you can get about it, um, the the easier it is for them to fulfill that for you. And I think what we hear um so much, the we hear these words. My kids are busy. And um your kids are busy and they do have busy lives, and that's all true. But don't make the decision for them in that they don't necessarily want to help you. If it feels like they don't want to help you, and I'm not saying that some kids can't help you, I get that, but a lot of kids aren't helping because they don't know what to do specifically. Yeah. And so they they're like, I I want to help my mom, but I don't know what to do, and I don't want to, like you said, cross any boundaries or step over, you know, whatever. Um, and them and the parents at the same time are like, oh, I'm good, I don't need anything. And it's just this just miscommunication that's happening, and it turns into feeling like, oh, they don't want to help me, or my mom won't, you know, whatever. And it's not that, it's just that neither of you know what what it needs to be done specifically and and how to help each other and and how to ask and then how to do it.

Heather Fisher 16:43

There's a huge difference. Yeah, there's a huge difference between saying, you know, I'm thinking about downsizing, can you help me sometime? Or I've been thinking about you know reducing the amount of stuff in the basement. Could you come over for two hours next Saturday and help me bring stuff upstairs to the donation center? Like those dynamics, one will never happen because it's too vague. And the other absolutely, you know, could happen. Could happen.

Jodi Rosko 17:13

Yeah, yes. So yeah, I think it's just um sometimes not asking because you feel like they're busy. Um, and so that's you just assuming that they're too busy to help you, but then sometimes people get bitter about that even when they haven't asked, right? Um and then not being specific about what it is that needs to be done. And you might not know every single thing that needs to be done, and that's okay. And it will reveal itself as you work towards it. So it just pick the thing that is the most glaring, obvious thing. I am sick of all that stuff on the dining room table because I just put it there as a place when I don't know what to do with it. I'm gonna clean off the dining room table. Do you have an hour or two on some speci you know, let me know the best time for you? You I mean, you can say this weekend, or you can say whatever works in the next week, what you know, do you have two hours that you can come over and help me? Yeah, whatever that is. I need to sort my paperwork into stuff that I is important. I need to clean off the dining room table, I need to move things from the basement, whatever it is, pick something specific and ask for it. Um, and then the next, you know, a couple weeks later it might be something else. And uh like I said, it will just start to reveal itself. You'll start to see it yourself and be like, oh, that that bugs me or that bugs me, and you'll get through it.

Heather Fisher 18:33

Yeah, absolutely. There's ways to ask for help too that's more in line with like an accountability partner. Um, you can ask a friend, you know, hey, I'm really wanting to go through my photos. Do you want to come over for coffee once a week? And we'll both go through your photos. Yeah, whatever that looks like, there are ways to just have that moral support as help too. Um, you know, not always just pulling in somebody, it's just keeping on on track. Um, you know, I know Jody motivates me when we're texting, like I'm going to the donation center, are you? And it's you know, that kind of help um can really just get you through the process as well.

Jodi Rosko 19:17

Yeah, even if you're not doing it together, if you if somebody else that you know is wanting to go through that process too, you know, give each other a call. Okay, I'm gonna spend 30 minutes down, you know, I'm gonna take a picture and sh send it to you before and after, whatever, just some kind of accountability around it can help you even just make yourself get excited about it. So here's some here's some list of of breakdowns of what it is. So physical help, moving furniture, lifting b heavy boxes, you know, organizing closets, maybe that's the you know, you gotta send the grandkids over with their friends and and they're gonna load up a bunch of stuff, you know, because it's heavy and like they need to, you know, whatever. So physical help, emotional support. So you just need somebody to listen to your stories. You just need them to, you know, sit with you while you're going through it, listen to those stories. And uh a lot of times when you're trying to let things go, um, once you've told the story, it's easier to let it go. Um, I don't know, that's just a mental thing that happens. Um you'll notice it as you start to do it. Um and you'll realize in your head, I think, that the story is interesting but not interesting enough to keep it. Or it's not like, you know, it's not something that you love so much that once you've told that story, you're like, oh, and because I told that story, I need it. Now it's like I told that story and it can go.

Heather Fisher 20:33

They didn't even glance up or laugh or smile, not that great of a story.

Jodi Rosko 20:37

But you didn't feel that connected to it when the story came out, and so that I think that's helps you uh let it go because it has a story, but this the story's been told and it's okay to let it go now. Yeah. Um decision making. So um you somebody that can help you with decision making, um, help you sort priorities of pros and cons and whatever. Be careful with the person you pick with this. You don't want to pick the person who's super sentimental and wants to keep everything. Um, and if you don't have the right person uh in your life for this, you absolutely can hire that person, a professional organizer, a move manager, somebody that can help you without having their own sentimental attachment to your stuff, um, but still who understands that they need to give you that um respect for your things. Um, you know, it's not just junk, right? Um so somebody who can help you with a different lens that they look through things.

Heather Fisher 21:33

Yeah, we had a client recently that had done so much over the past year of sorting their things and making decisions, and they hired um an organizing company for it was only like half a day, so it wasn't um you know, huge, they were handling everything, and that was just the help she needed to get over that final stage of like, I've done the things that were easy, I've done the things. That made sense and I knew what to do with, and now I'm left with this last bit that I'm either struggling making those last decisions on, or it's you know, more oddball stuff. I don't even know what to do with it if I don't want it. Um, and that help that she asked for was got them over the finish line for their move. Um, so it doesn't need to be an all or nothing. Um, you know, there's levels of I can do it myself to this point, and then I need to ask help either from a professional or family member to get through to the end.

Jodi Rosko 22:39

Yeah. And then the last one is logistical help. And some of this isn't even about moving. Maybe you need rides to appointments, maybe you need some tech help, um, maybe you need help navigating your paperwork. And maybe you have somebody in your family who's super great at paperwork and can do that, and maybe you don't, and then you can definitely hire people that can help you.

Heather Fisher 22:56

Yeah, one of our earliest episodes with Mark Healy on the driving and senior driving, uh, he gave such great advice on you know how the help needs to be specifically asked for in order for a plan to work. On and that goes back to this logistical, not just like, okay, I can't drive anymore, but like, okay, here's the things I specifically want to get to, here's when they are, can we make a schedule for that? And then you get the help you need. Everybody is glad that you are still getting to what you need to get to, uh, but it's not just um mix of resentment and like how do I help? What do you need? Um it can really be better with some clear um definition of what help is needed.

Jodi Rosko 23:46

For sure. So physical, emotional decision making, um, professional guidance if you need it, and logistical help. Those are your kind of buckets, and so think about who fits in those buckets for you. You know, who can help physically physical stuff, who can help with emotional stuff. So kind of think about those people and maybe write down some names of people that you might be able to ask for help in different areas. It may not be the same people for each thing, right? So you don't have to go to the same one person every time. Um, so who is that? Um so as as silly as it sounds, I think we are so bad at asking for help, we might actually need some words, right? Some some scripts of how how to do that. And so um using phrases like, you know, would you be open to, or I'd really like your help with, or hey, could I run something by you? Would you be able to, you know, whatever, yeah, um kind of soften it, like not like, hey, I need you to help me do this, like, you know, more you know, as as much of a um demand.

Heather Fisher 24:48

Can I get your advice on, you know, yeah, I'm feeling a little overwhelmed.

Jodi Rosko 24:54

You know, could we could we grab coffee and just you know, go through a few of my pictures or you know, whatever that is. Like, um, so and and think about the people in your life, the ones that are really organized because they love to be organized. Like those are the kind of people who would be like that's fun to them, right? It's fun, it's not like you're asking them something that's so out of their wheel, you know, wheelhouse.

Heather Fisher 25:19

They love that or seeing someone that's successfully gone through whatever you're needing help with, if it's downsizing, you know, your friends that have already done all of that, what worked for them, what what didn't, what help did they get that you might not know about? Um, you know, just noticing um that your neighbor might be great in their garden and helping you with something in your yard might just be an extension of what they already love to do. You know, they're not gonna be fish out of water. They're just like, Yeah, I will absolutely, you know, trim your bushes when I'm doing mine.

Jodi Rosko 25:58

Yeah, they probably can't wait to do that. They've probably been looking over there and going, I wish I could go trim their bushes.

Heather Fisher 26:03

Oh my gosh. I had a neighbor years years back, and you know, I was a single mom dealing with, you know, my house and the yard and uh busy life at the time, and it was overwhelming. And um, you know, I didn't have the right tools. We had a lot of trees in our neighborhood, and I, you know, have my rake, and it would take me hours and hours if I was gonna rake all these leaves, and he would just quietly bring his little ride-on thing with the trailer that scooped up all the leaves, and he would just wave at me as I'm out there raking, and he would just buzz around and do my whole yard around me, you know, in a half hour where it would take me, you know, a whole day. And you know, people love to help like that. And um, you know, he he would do that, and um, I knew I could count on him for those type of things that were easier for him than they were for me. And what a gift because it wasn't my skill set and my tools, and didn't have the things. So there's lots of people in your life where something you're feeling overwhelmed by is easy because of their talents, because of resources they have, whatever it is. Try to connect with those people and it will be a joy for them to make something that's simple for them, simple for you too.

Jodi Rosko 27:24

Yeah, yes, for sure. Yeah, so don't be afraid to ask for those things. Um because remember, letting them help you is a gift, right? Yeah, yes.

Heather Fisher 27:35

Yeah, and I mean keep in mind people don't know what you need unless you tell them. Right. Um, and I think we see a lot of people that you know do put up that wall of I'm fine, it's all fine. And maybe it's them not wanting to fully look behind the curtain themselves and see how things have changed. And certainly we have just been talking about how hard it is to ask for help even when you know you need it. Um but but people don't know unless you ask. So we can only encourage it.

Jodi Rosko 28:08

And I think the people who look so capable are the ones that don't get the help because they it just seems like, oh, they're okay, like I don't have to, you know, uh help them. But uh but they still might need it, like they still might need those things. So um again, just be really specific in the beginning. A global like I need help just feels big and like okay, but I don't know what to do for you. I think that's like when somebody something has happened to somebody um uh uh that's tragic or you know, like some kind of a bad thing. It when people are like, Oh, just let me know what you need, uh like you don't you don't know. Yeah, you know, they don't know how to help you. But if they say something specific like, hey, I'm gonna bring you a meal on Thursday, okay? Um, and then you know, that's that's so clear and easy. So you need to make it that clear and easy when you're asking for help um of what it is. It needs to be very like, hey, I need um some help going through my clothes in my closet.

Heather Fisher 29:06

Yeah, or take them up on that. Let me know what you need. I mean they they're saying they truly do want to help you, yeah, but they don't know how to chunk that down from the outside. So just you know, take people up on that. What yep, here is one thing that would really absolutely be amazing if you did this for me.

Jodi Rosko 29:29

And I think you'll find joy from it, and they'll find joy from it, and it will be a connection um in your life that feels so good, so um it feels so much better than being so independent and trying to, you know, get over the overwhelm um by yourself and stop feeling like you need to, like it's not a weakness.

Heather Fisher 29:47

I think in in you know, going through notes for this, I've thought back on times when I've said those same words to someone, um, you know, let me know what you need, and someone's going through something big and you know that, and you you know, I'm like, I really did want to help, but I didn't know what to do, and I probably felt like I just trailed off and didn't keep checking in or whatever. But um, you know, if that communication just breaks down a little bit more into thank you so much, I'll I'll get back to you next week, and here's what I do need. Um you know, there's joy on both sides.

Jodi Rosko 30:27

Yeah. And make yourself a list. Um, just go right now, make yourself a list of like the five things that bug you the most about about what's going on in your house. You know, like I can't stand walking by that pile of whatever, or I can't stand, you know, there's these heavy books and I can't move them, or you know, whatever it is, like just make yourself a little list and then see who you think in your life would be um the one that could help you get that off your mind because it's so heavy that that anxiety that that creates when you feel like you should be doing something and you can't physically do it or you haven't made yourself do it. Um, there is so much um weight to that in your mind that you aren't even thinking about.

Heather Fisher 31:07

Yeah, for sure, for sure. So a little mini challenge. Um ask for one thing this week, big or small. Um, just practice because we know with anything, practice makes it easier. The first time you go out on a limb and ask for help, it might feel uncomfortable, uh, but it gets easier. And even if you're met with the reaction, you know, not with the reaction you wanted, and that doesn't ask again. Just get over that hump, uh, get used to it. There's so many people that would love to help you. Um, if you need anything from us, resources, ideas, strategies on how to move forward, please reach out to us for that ask. Uh, downsizingroadmap.com. We are there. Uh, you can reach out to us by email. You can come in through our downsizingroadmap.com backslash help if there's anything specific that you need, or just start with our free guide, uh, downsizingroadmap.com backslash guide. All of those options um if if you need to practice on us, yeah, us, just ask us for help.

Jodi Rosko 32:16

Yeah, just um we if we told you a lot of things. Go to downsizingroadmap.com. All of that stuff is there on our website, and we also have a uh little Facebook group where everybody that's going through this can go in there and join and um ask questions and kind of help each other. Um, so you can join that as well. So uh downsizingroadmap.com has all of that. All of that right on the home page right on the homepage. So we would love to connect with you um outside the podcast. So um go ask for some help today.

Heather Fisher 32:46

Yeah, and we will be back next week with some more advice. Bye-bye. Thanks for joining us on the Downsizing Roadmap Podcast. If you found this episode helpful, be sure to subscribe, leave us a review, and share it with someone who might need a little downsizing inspiration. Have questions or ideas for future episodes, reach out to us on our website, www.downsizingroadmap.com. Until next time, let's keep simplifying and moving forward.